


La Máquina Mortal Affair

by jkkitty



Series: Story with Napoleon, Illya, Josephina (would suggest reading in order as it a growing relationship although all story are complete and separate) [10]
Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E.
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-31
Updated: 2014-03-31
Packaged: 2018-01-17 18:20:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1397824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jkkitty/pseuds/jkkitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Earthquake machines, injuried agents, and the rain forest. Napoloen and Illya must deal with another mad scientist and his inventions. April and Jo are sent to keep an eye on them. Warning: torture but not graphic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	La Máquina Mortal Affair

La Máquina Mortal Affair

The two women arrived by a small plane at Manizales, Caldas a community (section) of Colombia, South America. It was located in the basin of the Rio Chinchiná and Guacaica River

They rode on a rough road in the old bus used for transportation in the area toward the small mountain health center where the agents were being held.   The women studied their surroundings.

 Manizales was built in a mountain region with a number of ridge lines and steep slopes visible surrounding it. Coffee plantations dotted the slopes and donkeys, lamas, and pushcarts were in evidence throughout the ride. An inactive volcano could be seen in the background.

Their assignment was to provide support for two down agents. The concerned for the two men they were to protect increased with their apprehension for the medical conditions they might discover.

The clinic was set back within the shadows of one of the many slopes. Compared to the spic and span of New York's medical, the hospital offered little in the nature of modern equipment. The building itself was abode brick with small windows. Although clean inside, the smell of sickness poured out into the hall.

The doctor escorted the two nurses from the United States to the patients' room. "I am not sure why you were sent here," he began in English, "We have nurses to deal with our patients."

April Dancer and Josephina Nichovia Kuryakin, two of the few women in Section 2 of UNCLE, smiled at him. "I am Jo Nicholas and this is April Dancer. Whenever we have sick employees in a foreign country, our company sends in their own nurses. It is part of our benefit package."

It had been decided it was better not to use Jo’s last name as it might sent a message to people they prefer didn’t know who they were just yet.

The two women looked over their 'patients'. Napoleon Solo Number 1 Section 2 and Northwestern CEA lay unconscious in one bed. In the other one was his partner, Illya Nichovetch Kuryakin, Number 2 Section 2 also lying unconscious.

Both were pale and wrapped in bandages from head to toe but seemingly comfortable for the moment. Because both men had lost so many key electrolytes that were essential to life an IV solution of Lactated Ringer's hung above their heads and dripped into their arms. A smaller bag of sulfa hung next to it addressing the infections that were raging in their body.

No one was sure what had happened to them. Both had been found by some villagers left for dead in the rainforests. Shot, beaten, and tortured, they were barely alive when found.

Only the ID in Napoleon's pocket had identified them as UNCLE agents. When notified, UNCLE had sent the two Columbian UNCLE agents to protect them. Due to the limited number of agents located near the site, April and Jo were sent on security duty while Waverly worked with the government to obtain the men's freedom from Manizales.

The governor of Caldas, Jhon de Balboa, insisted on holding the two men until he was able to figure out what had left them in their present condition. Although UNCLE was aware of it, the Columbian government was unaware that de Balboa's actions were being directed by Thrush.

…..

The doctor left the two women with their patients. They examined the men to see how much damage had been done. They careful removed the bandaging to inspect the damage under them. Both were covered with deep welts and cuts on their backs from a whip.

The rest of their bodies were dotted with bruises, open sores, and abrasions. Although beginning to clear up, infection was still evident in many of their wounds. After applying the topical antibiotics that had brought with them, they rewrapped the agents.

The only sound the men had made during the examination was moans of pain as they were touched. Jo touched each man's face lovingly. One her brother; the other her lover.

"April and I are here with you," she whispered to them not sure whether they could hear her or not.

With a kiss on each of their foreheads, she looked back at April who had placed her hand on Jo's shoulder. "We'll keep them safe until Waverly gets them out." Jo nodded in silent agreement.

Although neither were nurses, they both had adequate medical education that actually reached the level of some of the doctors at the site. After the physical examination and a review of each man's chart, they contacted the UNCLE's doctor in New York about the two agents' condition by communicator.

"Okay, right now they should be on fluids, antibiotics, and some pain medication. Even though they aren't conscious, they can still feel pain," he informed the two women.

Before any medication would be administered to the men again, it would be checked by one of them. UNCLE had supplied them with a kit that would establish if there were any undesirable drugs in the fluids. In addition, UNCLE had sent them with antibiotics and pain medications that were known to be safe to replace the ones at the clinic.

The women requested a cot for the room. When asked why, April explained that they were to be 24 hours nursing and would take turn sleeping in the room, another service of their company.

…..

"What do you mean, they are staying in the room at all times?" demanded Leandro Restrepo, who was the Thrush represented in the area. "We need to find out from those men where they hid that missing machine part. Describe these women to me."

The doctor shook in front of him, "The one is about 5' 7", about 130 lbs., shoulder length brunette hair, and brown eyes. The other is about 5'4, about 115 lbs., pale strawberry blond head that long but up, and blue eyes. Both slender and pleasant looking."

Restrepo handed him two pictures, "Are these the women?"

"Yes, sir," the doctor said.

" _Maldición_ (damn), Dancer and Kuryakin. UNCLE must know something is happening here. Go keep an eye on them. Stop tampering with Kuryakin and Solo's medications. They'll be checking it before giving it to them. I'll get in touch with you when I decide what to do. Just let me know if the two men show any sign of waking up."

Restrepo called Central and informed them of the development. "Don't do anything until they wake up. Your men have already caused enough delays by almost beating them to death. Just keep an eye on them for now." The man from Central said as he hung up.

Restrepo slammed the phone down. He had done his job. It wasn't his fault that the UNCLE agents after being recaptured had been beaten nearly senseless. Then he was told that the two agents had managed to take a pill hidden in their teeth and seemed to die. No heartbeat or breathing was detected, so they were left where they had fallen.

Another of UNCLEs drugs to protect their agent, he supposed had given the appearance of death.  Later they had been found by villagers and taken to the clinic alive but in critical condition.

He had been leading the search for the system piece when his second in command, Jose Romeros, handled the search for the two agents. Well at least that would never be a problem again, his second in command was no more. Now, he needed to wait for the UNCLE agents to awake up to get the part.

Thrush took no excuses for failure. He now had to locate the machine part before any other damage could be done to his career.

…..

April was on watch when Napoleon started to moan in his sleep. He became extremely restless and yelled out in his sleep. Soon Illya joined him in this behavior. It was almost as if they were sharing a dream. She woke up Jo, "We need to give them something to help them relax."

First, they gave them something for pain, and then sponged them down. Both men finally relaxed once more but their eye movements told a different story. The two men were dreaming.

Dreaming

Illya and Napoleon sat in their usual place at the round table in Waverly's office. They waited for him to fill his pipe with Isle of Dogs No. 22 and attempt to light it. Both men smiled behind the folders they were examining when he failed. Finally he placed it in the ashtray and addressed them.

"We’ve had reports from our agents in Columbia that Thrush has been working in the background as advisors to some of the governors within that country. Something seems to be happening in the area, but no one has found out what Thrush is up to."

"Sir, I thought the new government has been cleaning house down there."

"Napoleon, they have been but remember the country had so many problems in the past and with the drug cartel, it is taking a long time to sort things out. That article I gave you a few weeks ago explained the whole situation," Illya informed him.

Napoleon gave his partner a sour look and when Waverly looked back down at his folder, gave him a light hit in the head. Although Waverly saw, he said nothing. Each member of his best team had their own attributes to offer to partnership.

Napoleon was the strategist, suave, and leader of the two. Illya was the scientist, source of diverse information, and the more aggressive. Napoleon would plan the operation but it was Illya who would ensure its success. Together they had survived situations where other teams failed.

"Gentlemen, your attention please," both men looked guilty at him, like children caught doing something wrong.

"You’ll be investigating the reports and discover if there’s anything to concern us. Two of our men from the area will meet you and sharing the information they’ve gathered. Your plane leaves in four hours."

Both agents left the room going over their checklist in their minds. "How updated is the equipment in Columbia?" Illya asked.

"Not the most current but not too bad. What are you thinking of Illya?"

"Just like to know what I can expect. By the way, you owe me $5.00. He never smoked the pipe."

"He tried," Napoleon replied.

"The bet was he would smoke the pipe, not attempt to."

Napoleon handed over the five, "Next time, we'll make the details a bit clearer." Many agents had a running bet as to whether or not Waverly would actually smoke his pipe. "See you in our office?" he asked.

"Half an hour," Illya responded as they separated.

…..

The plane ride was long but quiet. Napoleon flirted with the stewardess and Illya read. "It really would be interesting to see what Jo would have to say about your flirting," Illya teased his partner.

"We have an agreement," Napoleon grinned at him. "When we aren't together, I have to keep up the appearance of the suave, care-free playboy."

Illya choked on his tea, "Oh. Well I will be happy to tell her, you are living up to your image."

Both men settled down for a nap and woke as they were flying into La Nubia Airport which was located near Manizales. As they looked out of the window of the plane, they could see a country of mountains, volcanoes and rainforests. They were met by their counterparts from Columbia, Luis Alberto and Carlos Fernando.

"Illya and Napoleon welcome to Columbia," Luis said shaking each of their hand. "I see Mr. Waverly took our concerns seriously, sending his big guns."

The two New York agents knew that Luis was truly happy to see them, where at times they had met with resentment from agents that they had come to assist. "Thanks Luis. Just here to give you a hand."

"Oh no my friend, we now have a serious problem elsewhere. Waverly sent a message that you were to take over this operation. An appointment has been set up with Governor Jhon de Balboa and his new assistant, Leandro Restrepo. Leandro is pure Thrush. He knows that we know who he is, but is so self-confident that he doesn't care."

"Wonderful," Napoleon sighed, "Well at least we have all that out in the open. I suppose he'll recognize Illya and me."

"I'm not sure, but won't be surprised. Take care gentlemen, many people have gone missing in the area lately when they ask too many questions," Luis suggested.

"Gracias, my friend. We will be careful," Illya assured him.

After leaving the two Columbian agents, Illya and Napoleon checked into their hotel. They checked for bugs, and removed the ones that they found and then unpacked. "Do you think the bugs were for us or is this normal procedures for visitors?" Illya asked.

"Probably normal procedure, but by removing the bugs, whoever’s listening will know we’re more than just visitors," Napoleon answered.

"Might as well meet the governor and his assistant."  Illya said heading towards the door.

Chapter 2

Meeting the Enemy

Napoleon and Illya drove a beat up early 1950 Ford that UNCLE had modified for speed when needed. The car looked like the rest of the surrounding traffic so they wouldn’t stick out.

The governor's hacienda was on the outskirts of town in a wooden area. As they came up to the house, they could see and smell the coffee plants that were surrounding the grounds. Native workers carried baskets on their back to handpick the beans.

The front of the hacienda was vine covered with only touches of white coming through. They climbed ten stairs to reach the gold colored door. A white uniformed guard answered their knock immediately and searched them. Only their identification permitted them to carry their guns into the house.

As they followed the guard, they examined the hallway. It was done in an early Spanish style. Low hung chandeliers with lit candles; tall doorways of dark wood, complimented by dark wood furniture with embroidered coverings.

As they were told they would wait in the governor's office, they were led to the office and told he would join them soon. Dark wood bookcases with old books lined three walls of the room, and the beautiful windows gave highlights to each piece of furniture.

"Good afternoon gentlemen. I am Jhonde Balboa governor of Caldas; to what do I owe the honor of this visit. UNCLE agents usually do not come to see me," a smile that didn't reach his eyes followed the question. Another man quietly came into the room as Caldas was talking. "This is Leandro Restrepo, my second in command."

The men shook hands with each other. Restrepo adding a little extra pressure to both agents hands. It was his way of letting the men know that he knew why they were there.

"We’ve been asked to investigate some concerns that your government has," Napoleon explained.

"But why would my government ask UNCLE to investigate. Surely, we have our own security forces. Do you have any documentation of this request? I do not want you to think that I do not believe you Mr. Solo, but you must understand."

"Of course," Illya handed the written request to Balboa. "We all have our orders," he said with a grin, "And you know how that is. We go and do what we are told to do." Illya shrugged as if he was frequently going places without actually knowing why.

"Yes we do all have orders to follow. So what is this concern you are to look into?" Balboa seemed concerned and looked to Restrepo for assistance.

"There've been reports of shaking and landslide in your area of the country that don't seem natural. As there have been unusual problems in the past, our organization had a standing request to be notified of any such situations. Your government informed us of the problems here, and we were asked to investigate."

Napoleon watched Balboa and Restrepo faces as he explained the situation. Balboa began to sweat heavily. Restrepo began to redden with anger, fist clenched, nails digging into his hands. Neither man looked the two agents directly in the eye.

"I assure you, Mr. Solo, Mr. Kuryakin that this is not an unusual occurrence in this part of the world." Balboa argued. "I do not understand why it is causing so much concern at this time."

"I am sorry Governor Balboa, but we are just following our orders," Illya once again offered. "We will make our examination as quick as possible and be gone."

"Why send us agents, why not scientists then?" Balboa tried one more time to call them off.

"I'm sorry, governor. I forgot to mention, my partner’s actually, Dr. Kuryakin. He just usually prefers not to use the title," Napoleon countered the last augment.

"Governor, I think we can accommodate these two men," Restrepo spoke up for the first time during the conversation, "We can offer guides and guards to keep them safe." He smiled at the two agents. If they were going to follow this path, he was going to make sure that they didn't return.

A Trip to the Rainforest

Early the next morning Napoleon and Illya left with two guides and 10 guards. They knew that at least a few of those present were Thrush but for the most part the rest were Columbians.   Not sure who they could trust, it left them with little support.

…..

It took two days to reach the area of interest. The trip to the district being threatened by earth shaking and small quakes was through the jungle and up steep hills. No transportation was available so walking was the only means of travel that they could adopt.

As they traveled by foot, they could hear the Capuchin, Orangutan, and Howler monkeys screeching as they passed. The bright red Cock of the Rock and Scarlet Macaw called to their mates high in the canopy of trees.

The brilliant, dazzling colors of all the animals, birds, insects, and flowers around them, at any other time would've made this spot a wonderful vacation retreat. However, their journey didn't allow for such thoughts.

Napoleon did laugh when he saw Illya irritation after a Blue Morpho Butterfly persisted in landing on the bridge of his sunglasses even though he kept brushing it aside. "Seems it likes your sweet personality Illya."

Swatting the butterfly off one more time, he gave Napoleon an icy look saying "Your sense of humor is not at all funny," and walked faster leaving his partner behind.

…..

During the night, they took turns keeping watch and had caught more than one man snooping around their tent. Napoleon and Illya allowed the snooping but kept an eye on who was doing it. When they finally reached the outskirts of the site at least one guard 'helped and protected' them at all times.

…..

Restrepo arrived on horseback right after they made camp for the night. After conferring with two of the guards, he informed Illya and Napoleon that he had been checking out the area and found it safe. He assured them that the guards would accompany them to the location the next morning.

While the fire threw shadows on the darkened tree, "I'm surprise that he being so helpful." Napoleon told Illya during dinner. They had been able to sit by themselves within sight of the fire but not where the others could hear them

"We need to lose the guard to truly examine this area. Do you think we can create some sort of divergent tonight? That way we can get away and search without their interference."

"We could always wait till everyone is sleeping and leave." Napoleon said with a silly grin.

"Really, Napoleon. That is not very original." Illya responded with frustration.

"But it works. After they go to sleep, we'll leave. Because of the darkness, we should be able to far away from here before they notice us missing."

Searching for the Machine

They left their tent after the camp was quiet. The night was dark with small areas of moon showing though the heavy trees. The daytime noises gave way to the predators of the night. The cries of orange and black spotted Jaguar echoed through the night while searching for its supper.

As they made their way through the darkened night, they frequently saw Red Eyed Tree and blue Poison Dart Frogs jumping across their path. They moved quietly to avoid waking the noisier animals of the forest.

A few hours after leaving the camp, they came on a clearing. Old ruins lay in the middle of the pathway. They kept to the thick walls of darkened trees that gave the impression of sculpted tunnels. As they climbed the grassy stairs that led to the crumbling walls, they became aware of something growing out of the time worn ruins.

One look inside the ruins showed the newly built compound which had been constructed. Few guards were visible. "Probably setting up a welcoming committee for us tomorrow," Napoleon whispered to Illya.

"Let's see if we can get in, blow up whatever the machine is and get out of here without waking up that committee then," Illya suggested.

"I thought I was the optimistic one," Napoleon teased, "But I do like your thinking partner. Let's go do it and get it over with. Meet you back here in 15 minutes."

After double-checking their watches, they left to explore the area separately. When they returned to compare notes, they discovered four building inside the ruins.

Two was being used for the men, one as barracks and the other as a mess and rec hall. One of the other buildings was the lab. The final building had a large machine inside with four guards around it.

"Let's get inside, place the explosives and leave," Illya suggested. He was grinning at Napoleon as he suggested the plan.

"You know Tovarisch; sometimes I get concerned about your enjoyment of blowing things up. I'm not sure it always healthy," Napoleon ribbed his friend.

"Napoleon, we each have our ways of relaxing. You have your women; I have my explosions."

Napoleon chuckled. "Okay dynamo, let's go and get this done."

…..

The men avoided all the external guards and entered the building with the machine. Each darted two of the guards and then moved toward the center of the room. A 12-foot machine stood before then.

The sides of it were covered in switches, lights, and buttons. The gun shaped device reminded Napoleon of the top of the tanks he had seen in Korea. The large gun was able to turn a full 360 degrees and could also be raised and lowered.

"Where do you want these?" Napoleon asked Illya who was examining the system with what looked like longing. He also noticed that Illya took a small fragment off it, "Illya come on. Someone will be coming soon."

The two placed the explosives around the system and set them to go in 10 minutes, but as they reached the door, the explosives went off early with almost no damage. There was just enough powder to knock Napoleon and Illya down and kill the man standing next to it.

"Someone exchanged the explosives," was all Illya could spit out before alarms sounded and men began to pour into the building.

Escape

Napoleon was in the lead when they ran from the building. The only way open was the one leading away from the camp, and that the one they took. Both ran through the forest, being struck by low branches, tripping over vines and roots, and avoiding holes in the pathway. To leave the path would be dangerous, but they were left with no choice.

When the sounds of running feet passed them by, they were able finally to rest for a few minutes. It was then that Napoleon noticed that the pain in his upper leg was actually a bullet burn. It was painful but bleeding was minimal.

His hand came away red when he placed it on Illya's shoulder, "You're hit," he accused him, "When did you intent to let me know?"

"At the same time you let me know about your leg," Illya shot back.

"Okay, so neither of us was honest with the other. Mine just a burn, yours?"

"Clean through, just touched the shoulder," Illya shrugged then grinned. "Well, that did not go well did it?"

"I just can't figure out when the made the switch. I mean we watched them all the time. It had to be before we left. Any suggestions now?"

Illya thought about it, and then pulled out his communicator. "Open channel D," he said with a 'Waverly is going to be pissed look'. Instead of getting a connection, he only received static. "Well at least we can put that off for a while. We need something to blow that machine."

"Let's try to get back to the last clearing we were at, I was able to notify our headquarters here from there. Ask for more explosives and maybe some help. I’d assume it not going to be that easy to get into the place now."

…..

The two men headed in a direction that they believed was correct. Every so often, they heard the men chasing them in the distance. Suddenly, they trespassed into the territory of a large group of red howler monkeys who sent out a loud howling sound which alerted the guards to their location.

Tired, hungry and injured, the two agents ran on now utterly lost.

Chapter 3

Recaptured

The two men supported each other while they traveled as quickly as possible. Their appearance gave the impression that they had been in an explosion, which they actually had. The explosives that they had set had been substituted for their sometime during the trip and went off early.

The guards who were supposed to protect them were left behind when they left to search the site themselves. Now they were attempting to stay ahead of the group of Thrush soldier who were chasing them.

Both knew that the possibility of them making the climb over the next hill was extremely poor, but they pushed on. They needed to get the word of Thrush's takeover of the government to headquarters and the device they intended to use.

As they climbed, the blonde hair agent slipped taking the dark hair one with him. They fell down the hill into a hidden hole. Although both were shocked and hurt further from the fall, they believed that they were hidden from their pursuers.

 Napoleon asked, "Illya how bad are you?" after the group searching for them passed by them.

"As normal, fine Napoleon," said his partner.

"Last time you told me that, you spend three weeks in Medical."

He knew his partner's tendency to downplay his injuries. Oh course he wasn't much better, but he was the senior agent and responsible for those he worked with including his stubborn partner.

"Do you still have the piece?"

They had stolen the direction pointer of the machine, and without it the machine wasn't worth anything. Unknown to them, the only person who could replace it was killed in their explosion and that Illya had destroyed all the papers that explained the operation of the device with the ill-timed explosion.

"Of course," came a sarcastic response. Illya moved slowly to sit up, "I am going to bury it in this hole with a tracer on it."

…..

Both men worked at climbing out of the hole, but failed, "This place must be at least 20 feet high," Napoleon complained.

"Wrong Mr. Solo," a shadow appeared over them at the top of the hole. "It is more like 25 feet, but we are willing to help you out. Throw your guns to the side please." Restrepo and a group of guards stood above them.

They shrugged their shoulders and dropped their guns. A rope ladder was lowered to them. Each man climbed the ladder and was bound as they reached the top.

The guards pushed them along the route that they had just had ran down. Once they arrived at the first clearing they were force into the back of the car. "At least we don't have to walk," Napoleon smiled at Illya as he looked over his partner. "I was getting tired, how about you."

Illya remained silent but his quick eye contact assured Napoleon that he was essentially OK.

…..

When they returned to the camp they had tried to destroy, they noticed the lab had stopped burning and the system lay on a table outside the lab. It still looked intact with slight damage visible. It distressed the agents that their assignment remained incomplete. At least without the piece Illya had hidden, it couldn't be fired.

With no discussion both men were thrown into a cell after their arms were unbounded. Stationed in from of the bars were four guards with rifles aimed toward them.

"I do not think they trust us Napoleon." Illya quirked as he examined their surroundings.

It held only two piles of hay and a hole that would service as their toilet. No water or food was in place.

 "Guess we missed supper," Napoleon responded after his examination, "I don't think I give this place even one star."

Black and blue marks dotted their bodies. Their bruises and cuts were annoying and painful but not dangerous. They lay on the straw and waited for what would happen next. Once the fire was extinguished and the weapon tested, Restrepo would find out a piece was missing. At that time, the two agents knew they’d be in for intense questioning.

"We might as well get as much sleep as possible now, I’ve a feeling we won't be allowed to in a while," Napoleon suggested, then he noticed his partner had already sleeping. He never could understand how Illya could sleep anyplace or anytime but wish he could do the same.

"Where is the part?"

The banging of the cell doors and angry feet hurrying toward them brought the two men awake. "Must have found out the device is missing something," Illya said.

Napoleon agreed, "And he’s not too happy about it."

Restrepo stepped through the cell door after it was opened. "Gentlemen, I want that piece right now."

Both men looked at each other with puzzled expressions, "Piece?" they questioned together.

"Do not play games with me. You know what I am talking about. We reviewed the video and saw you remove it Mr. Kuryakin. If you do not give it to me now, I will make your lives a _que viven el infierno_ (living hell)."

"Illya do you know what he is talking about?"

"No, do you?" Illya responded.

"You will speak before I am done with you. Unless I have the piece now, you will live to regret any interaction we have." Turning he spoke to the guards. "Prepare them." And left the cell.

As the guards approached the two agents, they exploded into action. Napoleon dived into the right guards and Illya into the left guards. They were able to knock down a guard each but before they could overwhelm when other guards arrived and helped to overpower them.

…..

They were dragged to the courtyard of the camp and tired spread eagle to poles after their shirts had been removed. The tight ropes bite into their already painful arms. Hungry, thirsty and tired, neither man had the energy to hold themselves up to alleviate the pressure on their shoulders and back.

"Where is the part?" Restrepo demanded as he came from the building. His sadistic grin gave the impression he was hoping the men would not easily give them what he wanted.

Illya and Napoleon glared back at him. "I'm surprised Thrush Central wants you do to the interrogation. Usually they want Illya and I to be in shape for their torture," Napoleon taunted him. He was attempting to find out if Central knew of their capture, or if they only had to deal with the man before them.

Illya continued, "Maybe they are lowering their standards, Napoleon." This earned him a backhanded slap from Restrepo.

Restrepo ordered two men to come forward. Each held a riding crop and stood where the agents could see them. "You choice, the easy way or the hard way. You will tell me what I want to know."

Both men stared at him in cold defiance. With a wave of his hands, Restrepo's men took their place behind the agents.

The two prepared for the pain they knew was to come. The first lash struck and sent agony shooting throughout their bodies. Restrepo kept count as lash after lash attacked their bodies. The torture became searing and both men had to give up their silence for cries of pain. Finally both passed out sometime after each heard the count of ten.

…..

They woke up each lying on the prickly straw mattresses. The excruciating pain increased with each move.

"Napoleon?" Illya had awakened first and now heard his partner moans increasing.

"I'm awake; anyways, I don't think I could feel this bad if I was still unconscious." He tried to move and found nausea threatened to overwhelm him.

"Try to avoid any sudden moves, it will cause your stomach to react more," Illya warned him.

"Now you tell me. Oh, my stomach doesn't seem to want to stay down. Good thing they didn't feed us before that little exercise."

Illya crawled over to Napoleon's pile of straw, "Let me see your back," he told Napoleon. It was crisscrossed with swelling welts and red deep cuts decorated his back.

Napoleon made a twisting gesture with his hand. Illya's was similarly patterned. Nothing in the cell allowed them to clean up the site or ease the pain. Illya returned to his straw and lay on his side.

…..

Both men sat up when they heard the guards approaching again. Instead of being taken out, they were given some bread, thin soup and water. Napoleon looked at Illya, "If they wanted us dead or drugged they could do it anyways. What do you think?"

Illya took a sip, "We better keep up our strength until we can get out of here," and ate what was before him. Napoleon also ate and then both laid down once more attempting to sleep.

Round Two

They were woke up when it was still dark. Dragged from the cell into another room where they were tied to a lab table. Pain exploded from their own weight on their back. They knew it was already getting infected and would only get worst.

The leather thongs binding them to the tables were tight enough to cut into their skin. Restrepo stood before them, "Good Morning, I believe you know what I want. If you give it to me, we can stop this useless punishment."

"No thank you," Illya responded pulling on the bindings. They were too tight even to move his wrists.

"Mr. Solo. We know it was your partner who took the piece. Why allow his actions to cause you such pain?"

"Illya," Napoleon said with mock surprise, "Have been indulging in your kleptomania tendencies again?"

"I have tried to curb them, but you know how hard it is."

"You are trying my patience," Restrepo picked up a needle. "You will notice that I believe in a different method of interrogation. Instead of separately, I believe in allowing the two of you to suffer together. It seems to get answers quicker when someone misery is the same as their friend."

"Interesting idea," Napoleon offered.

"You will find this truth drug very interesting. Besides lowering the UNCLE installed barriers, it produces pain by increasing the sensitivity of the nervous system. Which in your case has already been sensitized from the beating? Gentlemen, do you really want to listen to each other scream?"

Neither man answered him. Restrepo handed the syringe to the doctor, "Proceed."

…..

At first they felt nothing, and then the pain began to intensify; searing down their spines, spreading throughout the rest of their bodies. Refusing to answer Restrepo’s questions added to the stress they felt, increasing the pain even more. The sound of their screams drowned out each other. After what seemed like hours, finally darkness came relieving them of this torture.

…..

Restrepo lifted the headset; he wasn't looking forward to this conversation. He hadn't informed Central of Solo or Kuryakin's capture and was wondering who had notified them. "Restrepo, here."

"Mr. Restrepo perhaps you will be so kind as to inform me why I was not notified of your prisoners?"

"Sir, I was trying to locate the essential piece of equipment they had taken."

"So, besides not notifying me of the prisoners’ capture, you also failed to inform me that a vital part of the machine is missing. AM I CORRECT?"

"Yes sir, but I was planning on calling you as soon as I had recovered it. I'm sure it will not be much longer until one of them gives me the information I need."

"You will not proceed with the interrogations. I will have an expert there in the morning. Make sure that they are in condition to be questioned when we arrive. Do you understand?"

"But sir, they are so close to breaking now."

"Mr. Restrepo, I will not repeat myself. Mr. Solo and Mr. Kuryakin have not just your missing machine part but the information we need on a few other matters. You will see that they are able to be questioned by us. Give them whatever medical care they need and feed them. "

"Yes, sir."

"And we will discuss your actions when I get there." The phone went dead in his hands.

He intended to find out who had betrayed him, and after he was through with him, no one would ever challenge him again.

Chapter 4

Fattening up for Central

Once more the two agents were awakened by the opening of the cell door. Instead of being removed, a doctor entered to examine them. After cleaning and applying a smoothing lotion, he gave them antibiotics.

Next they were given a full meal. The smell of the Bandeja Paisa made their stomachs growl. After not having anything other than brown bread for a few days, they were ready to dig in immediately.

The huge platter of grilled steak, fried pork rind, chorizo sausages on rice and red beans was topped with a fried egg and a side of sliced avocado and sweet banana chips.

After the guards and the doctor left, Illya looked at Napoleon. "I don't understand."

"I have a feeling someone else is giving orders now," Napoleon answered examining his food. "Smells and looks okay. Do you think we should try it?"

"They could kill us at any time, and have already tried drugs," Illya dug into the food.

Just after they finished eating, Restrepo entered the cell. "Why the change of heart?" Napoleon asked pointing to the empty dishes with a knowing grin.

"Don't gloat Solo. Someone from Central will be here in the morning and then neither of you will keep your secrets long," with this he turned as stormed out of the cell.

"Seems like Central would like our presence again," Illya sighed.

"One of the problems with being the best, everyone wants a piece of you. You do know that we need to get out of here tonight don't you?" Napoleon asked and then proceeded to outline his plan. Even when flying by the seat of his pant, his plans were generally successful.

"Why must I always be the one that is ill?" Illya complained.

"Cause Tovarisch, you play pitiful so much better than I do."

…..

Illya began to moan as he held his stomach. The guard only glanced in his direction.

"Illya, what's a matter?" Napoleon asked loudly as he knelt beside his partner.

"Napoleon, I think that I am having a reaction to the food. There must have had peppers in it, and you know how badly I react to them."

"Guard, unless you want a dead man you better get some help here," Napoleon yelled toward the door.

"What's the noise in here?" the guard demanded.

"He has a bad allergy to peppers. We were so hungry that we didn't even notice it when we were eating. If he doesn't get treatment immediately, he's going to die."

While Napoleon was explaining the situation to the guard, Illya feigned becoming short of breath and withered on the pile of hay. He held his stomach as he yelled out a groan of pain.

Escaping Again

This brought the guard into the cell. He ordered Napoleon away with his rifle. "One move from you and he gets it," as he bent over to check on the moaning Russian.

In a second the guard laid unconscious on the straw. Illya grabbed the rifle and led the way out of the cell. They ran along the halls, past the interrogation room and up the stairs to the exit. As the door opened the piercing sound of the alarm sounded.

Both agents continued running, Illya firing at the men coming their way. Napoleon scooped up a gun from a fallen guard following behind his partner into the rainforest.

Angry monkeys screeched loudly in the night, perceiving that they were being threatened by the human's presence. The calls of birds woken from their sleep joined the howls of the monkeys giving the trackers an audible trail to follow.

Thick trees and vines tripped them up in the darkness. They stumbled often as they attempted to stay ahead of the men following them but failed. Pulling up and glancing around, they knew that they were surrounded.

"Tovarisch?" Napoleon asked looking toward his partner pointing to his own mouth.

"We have no choice. Let's hope that the capsule is as good as research tells us. I hope to see you in an hour, my friend," Illya said as he dislodged the capsule from his false tooth and swallowed it. Napoleon followed suit.

Although it wouldn't work for a few minutes, both knew this could mean the end of their lives. They raised their hands and were silent during the beating that followed until they collapsed.

"They are dead sir," the guard said after examining them. "I smell almonds."

"I did not think UNCLE went for cyanide capsules. Leave their bodies, the animals will take care of them." He said and walked back to the compound. Restrepo would be angry, but what was he to do.

…..

When they arrived back at the compound Romeos reported to Restrepo. "I'm sorry sir, but who would have thought UNCLE would supply their men with a method of suicide."

"You were told to capture them," Restrepo raged, "Not to beat them again."

"But sir," was all he managed to say before the gun blast hit him in the chest.

"Clean up this mess, and get me Central."

The discussion with Central didn't go well. They were questioning his ability to control his men. The project was finished unless the missing part was found, and with the dead UNCLE agents that won't happen. Restrepo drank himself to sleep that night.

…..

The night was darker when they woke. The fact that they felt every little pain, and had a headache that threatened to tear their heads off their shoulder was even desirable to death. They knew that they had fooled Thrush. Now the question was could they continue to a place where aide would be available.

Both had to admit their reserves and strength was almost gone. They helped one another get up and then moved along the well-worn path. Finally they saw a camp fire in the distance village's center. As they reached the outskirts of the village, they fell for the last time and slid into the unconsciousness.

Awake

Jo noticed as the two men began to open their eyes. "April," she called, "They are waking up!"

Napoleon woke up first, smiling as he saw the two women. Jo gave him a sip of water, "Slowly," she warned as he tried to drink more. "You have been out for two days."

"Angels of mercy, where are we? How is Illya?" he asked.

Jo grinned, "I have been called a lot of things but never an angel. My brother is right next to you. He is coming through a little slower than you. You are in a clinic outside the city."

"What are you two doing here?"

April pushed the hair off his forehead, "Waverly felt you two needed bodyguards, and the Columbian agents needed to follow up on another assignment. Balboa along with Restrepo is attempting to keep you here until they find out what happened in the forest—or so they’ve told the central government. Waverly’s working with his political connections to have you released."

Illya woke coughing. April gave him sips of water and helped him sit up some, "Hi there," she smiled at him, "Have a nice nap?"

She repeated her explanation to Illya. "How safe are we?" he asked.

"I don't want to take bets on it," April informed him.

She could see both men were experiencing pain, so she drew two syringes; handing one to Jo.

"What's that?" Napoleon asked.

"Something for the pain," April explained.

Jo began to inject the medication into Napoleon's IV line

"Don't you want me to turn over," Napoleon teased.

"Cute, Mr. Solo," Jo told him, "I've seen a lot more than your bare butt that keeps me interested in you," and continued to push the medication.

Illya uncharacteristically accepted the medication without complaint; giving a clue to the amount of pain he was in.

"You two get some more sleep. I'm going to inform Waverly that you're awake and see how much progress he's made," April said.

After speaking to Waverly and learning that he was still working on getting them transferred to New York, the two women began to worry. Now that Napoleon and Illya were awake it was likely that there’d be a move against them.

 …..

 

Later that day, Luis Alberto and Carlos Fernando arrived to check on the agents' condition. "Why do not you ladies take a walk around the village," Carlos offered, "After all you have been locked up in this room for the last two days."

Shopping

The girls looked at each other, "Shopping!" April said with a grin. If there was anything that April loved more than being an UNCLE agent, it was shopping.

They checked the men's IV fluids and after ensuring that they were comfortable; the women left.

The mountains were clearly visible over the forest that surrounded the small village, with perhaps only twenty-five families living there.

Children leaned in many of the doorways of their poorly maintained wooden houses, smiling and waving to the women as they passed on the dirt road. As they reached the general store, other children circled around them.

They walked inside, noting that the children stayed outside. "They aren't allowed in," April commented in answer to Jo's questioning look. "Not if gringos are here. It’s believed that if they’re in here we might not buy."

" _Eto smeshno_ (that is ridiculous) April," she said in Russian.

"But the way of life here," April shrugged.

" _Da, YA taĭskiĭ eto ponimayut, no ne nado eto nravit·sya._ (I understand it, but do not have to like it)." Jo smiled sadly at the children. She remembered being one of them. Wanting what others had, but not allowed to have it.

…..

April and Jo tried on some native clothing, which made the children laugh when the women turned modeling the clothing for them as they peeked through the door.

April finally selected a white top, while Jo predictably chose a black one, both sewn with brown yellow, white, orange and reds designs as well as brown full-length shawls with similar designs.

Before finalizing their purchases, Jo had the man behind the counter empty a large glass container of candy into a bag; paying for that as well. As they left the store, she sat down on the steps and passed out the candy out to the children.

"Can't wait to tell all the guys about the other side of Jo Kuryakin," April said grinning at her.

"I would suggest that you not follow through with that," Jo gave her a warning glance, "Remember April, I can always deny it and pay back will be sweeter than that candy."

April lead the way back to the clinic laughing. True Jo would pay her back, but it would be worth it to have one of the myths about the female Kuryakin dispelled; especially since she hadn't noticed April taking a picture with her camera disguised as a lighter.

…..

"Well, what did you buy?" Napoleon asked April after Jo had escorted Luis and Carlos to their car.

Both men seemed more comfortable and awake now. April pulled out the clothes and showed the guys them. "Jo brought things also."

"Rather decadent for a Communist; buying something absolutely without needing it," Napoleon teased her.

"Napoleon Solo, I will have you know that I buy things all the time that are not always necessary." Jo shot back at him.

He grabbed her hand and pulled her toward him kissing her gently on the lips. "Just teasing my love," he whispered in her ear.

"I like the way you have of quieting her down," Illya said, "Oh Jo, I do have one question," She looked his way, "Do you have any more of the candy April said you were giving out?"

"April!" she moaned.

"Couldn't pass it up, sorry dear." A big grin across her faces belaying what she said.

…..

After supper, Napoleon and Illya fell back to sleep. Jo laid down for some at the same time with April on guard. Before April could do anything, the window suddenly exploded and gas seeped into the room,

Within seconds, everyone was unconscious and never saw the Thrushes who were there to transfer them to the waiting truck.

Chapter 5

The four agents woke chained to the wall. Arms and legs spread eagle, they faced one another. " _Proklyatie_ ," Illya said as he opened his eyes, "I have a massive headache, and I see we are in a cell again."

"It’s not my favorite place either," Napoleon answered him.

"Why can't they design gas that doesn't give you a headache? I'd be willing even to give them our formula if they want," April said.

Jo only added a string of profanity in Russian to the conversation.

"I thought you were working on your temper," Napoleon teased.

One icy stare and he decided not to continue, "I can't believe they were so willing to risk the kidnapping," she said annoyed.

"What do they want?" April asked.

"Seems they lost an important part of their machine, and they think Illya and I have it."

"And I suppose you know nothing about it." A grin was the answer she received.

Though not affecting the women yet; the cold was working against Napoleon and Illya, as their fevers were beginning to return. The musty smell of the air caused both of their stomachs to rebel and the headache to worsen.

"Now all we need is Restrepo," Illya said just before the door of the cell opened, "And speak of the devil."

Restrepo stormed into the room, and immediately backhanded Napoleon and Illya. "You will suffer for what has happened because of your interference."

"Guess Thrush Central wasn't too happy about our escape."

Illya shrugged his shoulders, "What do you expect when you are second best?" earning himself another backhanded slap.

Restrepo brought his attention to April. "Ah, Miss Dancer truly a pleasure. I understand you are moving up nicely in UNCLE. It is a pleasure to meet you," Restrepo gave a small polite bow.

"Yours alone I’m sure," April answered him. Rage began to appear on his face.

"And so Miss Nichols I have a question for you that has been nagging at me." he said turning towards Jo.

"Oh and what would that be?"

"When I removed Solo and Kuryakin's guns earlier, they each had their last initial on the handle. Miss Dancer had a D on her handle, but your gun confuses me. Instead of an N it has a K on it. Why might that be?"

Jo gave him a grinned, "Oops must have picked up the wrong one at headquarters."

He slapped her and angry countered, "Do not play games with me, Miss Kuryakin, I not the fool that you think I am. I know who you are and you are not as clever as you think."

She glared back at him in response, "Then why ask, besides cannot blame a girl for trying." He lifted his hand to strike her again but stopped himself.

As they watched, Restrepo slowed down his breathing and straightened his uniform. "Gentlemen, I believe we have some unfinished business," he said turning back toward Illya and Napoleon. "I want the machine bit, now."

Napoleon and Illya knew that because of the women; it’d be more difficult to say nothing, but they also knew that if they gave him the piece, the world wouldn't be safe.

"Do not be concerned for the women. I will not insult you by assuring you I will exchange their lives for the information; as we all know that will not happen. In addition, I believe that UNCLE agents are as expendable as are ours and the assignment must come first. No, I will keep them alive for now so that they will see my success after you cooperate."

'Yea, right.' Napoleon thought to himself. 'Well at least they'll be okay for a while longer.'

"Bring them," Restrepo he told the guards, "When we leave, you may unchain the women."

One More Time

Illya and Napoleon were taken to the 'lab' where they were told to remove their clothes. When they failed to comply, the guards began to remove them for them, pulling off the bandages also. They were made to lie on cold metal tables with their hands and feet chained in place.

Electros were attached to various places on their bodies. One of the guards handed Restrepo two syringes filled with an orange fluid.

"I believe you gentlemen remember this little drug. It will increase any pain that you feel. Perhaps you would like to tell me where the part is before I inject you."

Neither man said anything, preparing themselves for the pain that would follow. Once injected; a pail of ice water was dumped over both of them and within minutes the discomfort from it was almost unbearable.

"You know how to stop the pain," Restrepo reminded them, "Do you wish to tell me where it is?"

"No," the two agents said in unison.

He hit the switch, triggering the generator to emit jolts of electricity through their muscles causing them to contract and tense. Both men gritted their teeth against the pain as they twisted and turned as much as their bindings permitted.

The burning began at the site of each electrode and sped throughout their bodies; though they managed to avoid acknowledging it at first, their anguish could no longer be left unvoiced. Their screams tore from their throats in unremitting agony.

Restrepo turned the current off, "Gentlemen you do not look well," he said glancing at the agents. Their bodies were trembling in agony, sweat poured from their faces. "There really is no reason for us to continue, just tell me where it is."

April and Jo

"Well you please stop pacing?" April asked Jo.

She had been walking nervously back and forth for the last two hours. After Napoleon and Illya were taken from the cell, the women had started searching for any means of escape but they had no success and so they waited in anticipation; listening to the screams that came from the next room.

April reach out and stopped Jo from pacing by pulling her into her arms and holding her in a hug giving her emotional support. Jo reacted stiffly at first and sat there. Slowly she encircled April also and both women sat silently for a while before speaking.

"Sorry April, I just cannot sit listening to that."

"I know it hurts to listen, I don't like it either." After each subsequent scream, the two women squeezed each other tighter for mutual support.

"We need to be strong for those two. I've known them for a long time, worked with them and fought with them. They’re like brothers to me. I’ll never get over the pain of listening to them suffering."

After sharing a few tears, they regained their composure and sat just holding hands for support. "Talk to me Jo."

"About what?" once again the cry of pain pulled her eyes to the door.

"The ring Napoleon gave you," April grinned.

The ring had been the talk of the water cooler for over a week before a new subject took over. Everyone had their opinion, but only the few who knew Napoleon and Jo personally believed that he had given it to her.

"I do not know what you are talking about, April. Why would he want to give a ring to me?" she lied.

"Really Jo. Just watching the two of you together gives away your feelings for each other." Jo was somewhat shocked at that statement. "It's not hard to see the truth? And I'm sure Mr. Waverly has a good idea what's going on."

Jo put her head into her hands and shook it, " _Chertvoz_ , he has not said anything."

"And probably won't unless it interferes with your job. Personally, I think it's wonderful for both of you. The ring?" April asked again pointing at it.

"Just that, I liked it and brought it." Jo said still continuing the lie.

"Okay, keep denying it, but let me tell you, I don't buy it.'" April noticed the silence from the next room, "It's quiet."

With no sounds came from outside the cell, a slight fear began to form in both women as they waited to see what would happen next.

The Missing Part

Once again, the men refused to talk. Just as Restrepo was ready to restart the current, one of the guards came running into the room. "How dare you interrupt me?"

"Sir. They found it. The La Maquina Mortal will now work. The searchers used a Geiger counter and located it in the hole where the two men were taken. It will be here in about 30 minutes."

Napoleon turned his head toward Illya, "They're calling it the Deadly Machine. Where do they get their names?"

"I believe they must have a division whose job it is to think them up."

"I see that you have not lost your wit, gentlemen. We will see how long it last when I'll keep you alive long enough to see how well my device does and how badly you've failed. Throw these two back into the cell. See that some water and their clothes are given to the women. "

Illya and Napoleon were dragged into the cell and dropped on the floor. Their clothes and the container of water were left next to them, "The boss wants them cleaned up and dressed," was all that was said before the cell door slammed shut again.

April and Jo went to the men.

"Don't touch us," Napoleon said. "He gave us a drug to increase our sensitivity, everything extremely painful."

"We need to get you off the floor and at least clean you up some. We'll be as gentle as possible," April assured them.

Their chest, legs, and arms had burns. Each one was reddened and the shape of the electros clearly visible. Leg and arm muscles twitched as they laid the men on the straw.

Each stroke of the cloth felt like someone was using a scrub brush on them, but the men allowed it. Soon they were helped into their clothes and laid back down. Napoleon's head rested on Jo's lap while Illya rested on April's.

"I take it that they found what they want," April said.

"Did not think about radiation," Illya explained, "They used a Geiger counter. We need to stop them," he said trying to sit up but April pushed him back down.

"Get some rest," Jo told them. "We cannot get out of here yet; there is still some time. He is waiting for the Central envoy to arrive," once they heard that two men drifted off.

"I do not suppose they will feed us," Jo said to April knowing in order for all of them to escape that they would need all their strength.

"Right. They'll do that right after they give our guns back," she kidded continued the banter.

…..

Later that evening Restrepo came to the cell door. "Come with me," he invited cheerfully, "I want you all to see what I've achieved even with your interference. After that, I believe you have a date with Central." He waved the guards to herd the prisoners out of the cell.

They were not bound which surprised them, but they were surrounded with guards. The agents had made some plans but needed to wait to see what was awaiting them to determine how to proceed.

The ramp above the machine was empty except for the prisoners, their guards, and the representative from Central. They could hear Restrepo screaming at the men down below and then saw him climbing the stairs two at a time in anger.

He grabbed Illya and yanked him toward the steps. "You will replace the piece as you found it. The man who was killed first explosion that you caused was the machine's operator."

"No, I think not," Illya replied.

April and Jo had guns pointed at their head, the threat obvious. "I doubt you are willing to let either one of these ladies die."

Illya saw no alternative at this point and advanced toward the machine. He took the piece and attempted to put it in the opening. Although he did attempted to replace it, his found that his hands were too swollen from the restraints and torture to fit it in the opening correctly.

An idea came to mind. It might be the end of all of them, but better to destroy this machine and themselves than let Restrepo achieve his insane scheme. He glanced around and saw the men who were present had larger hands than his.

"You tender care, has swollen my hands and I cannot place it correctly," he informed Restrepo. As Restrepo was raising his hand toward his men, the Thrush Representative spoke, "I can see from here that he is telling the truth. Have one of these women do it."

April was pushed toward the stairs by the guard. "No," Restrepo, "Bring the other one; he is less likely to do anything to kill his own sister."

Jo moved forward and down the stairs. As she approached Illya, they heard "Remember Mr. Kuryakin, the first to go will be you and her."

"Miss Kuryakin, ensure you make no mistakes. Your hands will be small enough to install the piece back where it belongs. I will be watching very move you make."

Jo took the bit from Illya who instructed her how to install it. Tripping he fell forward into her; quickly saying in Russian " _Uprotivopolozhnoe tomu, chto ya vam skazhu , a zatem sprygnutʹ bystro_. ( _Do the opposite of what I tell you and then jump off quickly_ ). The guard pushed Illya away with the butt of his rifle.

"Speak English," he demanded.

"I was just saying I was sorry for bumping into her," he spit back.

"Enough," the Thrush Representative roared. "Either get that thing working or I'll leave now!

Illya gave Jo directions on inserting the chip. He also managed to use some code words, which signaled April and Napoleon to get ready to move.

Once Jo completed the last turn, she yelled, "Now," and the four agents when into action. Knocking down everyone who happened in their way, they ran out the door at the same time that a massive explosion took place eliminating many of Thrush personnel.

From the forest, gunfire began and removed the few guards that remained. Luis and Carlos had found the outpost and were rounding up the last of the Thrushes who were still alive.

The Central envoy step out of the destruction, bushing himself off. He walked over by the four agents, "So you managed to escape our conversation again. One day you will not be the winners, and then we'll have our little talk." Carlos led the man away who seemed unconcern about his capture.

"Everyone okay?" Napoleon asked just before passing out, followed immediately by Illya. Their abuse, lack of food and sleep finally caught up with the two of them.

…..

When Napoleon and Illya next woke up, they could smell the antiseptic odor of Medical. The gray walls with the same pictures that were there to ensure the agents that they were in New York. IV's were running and the heart monitors were beeping, soothing sound even if it was annoying; it said home to injured agents.

Dressed in the outfits they had purchased in Columbia, April and Jo came into medical with gifts for the men. For Illya they had science magazines in various languages and Napoleon magazines were about sailing and boating. Finally they handed them copies of their contributions to the final mission report, to be combined with Napoleon and Illya's half.

"We're sick you know," Napoleon complained. "You could’ve put them together for us."

"Sorry luv," April explained, "Jo and I will be joining our usual partners for assignments. Mark and I are heading for London."

"While Andreas and I are going to Paris."

"Who's going to keep us warm at night," he said giving Jo suggestive grin.

"We even thought of that and bought you a souvenir of Columbia." she informed them. They handed the men each a three foot high stuff monkeys dressed in tee shirts with their names on.

While Illya sat there arm crossed and scowling at his, Napoleon asked, "What am I supposed to do with this?"

"It will help keep your bed warm and my place in it safe," Jo said as the two women walked out laughing as they went off to meet their partners.

"These are cute aren't they," Napoleon teased his partner and by creating monkey screeches. When he didn't get any response, he tossing monkey toward him and said, "A barrel of these are more fun than you are."

Illya returned the monkey by flipping it through the air. Soon the two were throwing them back and forth, laughing so loud that they didn't hear Waverly entering.

"Gentlemen," he said as watched them. Both glanced at him with a look of small boys caught misbehaving. "I'm glad to see you are doing better. Your report is due in my office tomorrow," he said as he walked out shaking his head. They might be his two top agents, but he was happy to see they still had the spark of a child in their soul.


End file.
